Waiting

Standing there she waits. She’s been waiting only for fifteen minutes but that’s already a lot for her. She’s the kind of person who is usually so punctual that she doesn’t mind waiting for someone for over an hour if she’s early, but can’t bare to wait a single minute when someone’s late. And there she was, waiting. She was waiting for a friend, an old boyfriend, an old love, someone she would only see once a year now that they were living far apart. And she waited. While standing there, a million thoughts popped up in her mind. He had stood her up before, why wouldn’t he do so now? She started feeling the sadness she once -- or twice, or even more -- had felt when she loved him. She started to wonder if she still loved him, and she wasn’t sure. She knew he wasn’t the right person for her to spend the rest of her life with, but she couldn’t help feeling that he was the one, even though he didn’t feel the same. Sadness started to spread all over her. She felt used, ugly, worthless, when she suddenly realized that he wasn’t worth all this trouble. She had already been through so much that she didn’t deserve to feel like that, to wait like that. Alone. Lonely. But they were still friends!!! Were they? Can lovers ever be real friends? She started to question all she thought she knew about life. But what could she possibly know? She was only 22. Then a new feeling took over, the feeling that she had wasted four precious years of her life worrying and caring about him. He was a jerk! He was half an hour late, like he had done before. He wasn’t coming any more, she knew it, just like he hadn't before. However, she still had some hope inside her. At this moment, she felt like going away. Just as the characters of Samuel Beckett’s Waiting for Godot, she said to herself "I’m going away", but there she stood and there she still waits.